Am I the only one who enjoys being married?

pholmann · Apr 7, 2015

I have an awesome wife, but like all of life it does throw curve balls at you. My wife has been struggling with negativity really badly. She lost her father almost two years ago and her mother has since pretty much lost it. He died a week before their 50th anniversary. She stays frustrated and aggravated from dealing with her mom. It has put an enourmous strain on our relationship in the process. We have been together for 15 years and married 10 of them. This has changed her so much in a negative way that it is a lot to handle. I am generally a positive person so this is extremely obvious to me and I struggle with being supportive. Since she is an only child and her mom lives next door, there is no escape. All I can do is ride it out and hope my wife returns when this is over (or a version I can live with) since her mom is very sick as well. She has changed in so many ways because of this. She has severe anxiety and fear from something. She used to wheel with me like a champ, and now she is a nervous wreck and panics at the slightest off camber situation. The same can be said in everyday life for her. For better or worse, rich or poor, in sickness and in health. I'm here til the end!

trucker · Apr 7, 2015

Re: Re: Am I the only one who enjoys being married?

mikemounlio said:
I have learned that being married is the biggest job you will ever have in your life. You are your own boss and you have to work your ass off. If you wife or husband has the same attitude about the marriage then you will be the happiest person around you and that is infectious. Sure my wife and i get pissed at each other but thats ok . Our marriage is stronger then ever and it brings me more joy then any of my offroad toys or bikes or cars.

IMHO the people that dont like their marriage need to take a step back and ask themselves are they really trying. You married the person for a reason then you let that slip. Its up to you to keep it! I have been married a very short 6 years but have been with the same woman since JR year. I would not change my marriage at all.

Very well said.

muddinmetal · Apr 7, 2015

pholmann said:
I have an awesome wife, but like all of life it does throw curve balls at you. My wife has been struggling with negativity really badly. She lost her father almost two years ago and her mother has since pretty much lost it. He died a week before their 50th anniversary. She stays frustrated and aggravated from dealing with her mom. It has put an enourmous strain on our relationship in the process. We have been together for 15 years and married 10 of them. This has changed her so much in a negative way that it is a lot to handle. I am generally a positive person so this is extremely obvious to me and I struggle with being supportive. Since she is an only child and her mom lives next door, there is no escape. All I can do is ride it out and hope my wife returns when this is over (or a version I can live with) since her mom is very sick as well. She has changed in so many ways because of this. She has severe anxiety and fear from something. She used to wheel with me like a champ, and now she is a nervous wreck and panics at the slightest off camber situation. The same can be said in everyday life for her. For better or worse, rich or poor, in sickness and in health. I'm here til the end!

This sounds horrible, but the only thing that will probably even bring her out of the funk is the passing of her mother... Being around someone so tortured & being tied down with them in a caregiving role takes a lot out of people... I wish y'all the best :****:

pholmann · Apr 7, 2015

Its been a rough ride for sure. Thanks for the thoughts. Sorry to hear about your situation as well.

TheViking · Apr 7, 2015

Re: Re: Am I the only one who enjoys being married?

trucker said:
Very well said.

X2 and praying for you man I know when the wife deals with mom issues living a similar situation myself.

bad80cj · Apr 7, 2015

pholmann said:
I have an awesome wife, but like all of life it does throw curve balls at you. My wife has been struggling with negativity really badly. She lost her father almost two years ago and her mother has since pretty much lost it. He died a week before their 50th anniversary. She stays frustrated and aggravated from dealing with her mom. It has put an enourmous strain on our relationship in the process. We have been together for 15 years and married 10 of them. This has changed her so much in a negative way that it is a lot to handle. I am generally a positive person so this is extremely obvious to me and I struggle with being supportive. Since she is an only child and her mom lives next door, there is no escape. All I can do is ride it out and hope my wife returns when this is over (or a version I can live with) since her mom is very sick as well. She has changed in so many ways because of this. She has severe anxiety and fear from something. She used to wheel with me like a champ, and now she is a nervous wreck and panics at the slightest off camber situation. The same can be said in everyday life for her. For better or worse, rich or poor, in sickness and in health. I'm here til the end!

You and I need to sit around the campfire and drink a beer or a keg.