I know where you can get a dana 60 and dana 70 with 3:07 gears. The gearing all depends on whether or not your truck has enough power to pull it. Lower gears are nice around town for towing but I went from 410 to 3:54 just to get better freeway speed while towing. I only really notice the gearing difference on winding slow towing roads. I would not go back to 4;10 with 31" tall tires. My GCVW is 21k and t does just fine with 3.54. But its a 12Valve, they like the lower RPM's.
I have ran over 2800 rpms for hundreds of miles and never worried about it. I did notice the milage is sure better if you keep it under 2k though. I prob wouldn't hold it over 3k for extended periods, although I doubt it would really hurt it. The only Issues I have heard about running over 3K is the water pump just keeps pumping more with more RPM so I you may have a coolant line blow off. Other than than no worries.