patooyee
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I have an old friend from another state (no one on this forum) who I later fund out considered me a better friend than I considered him. I knew him for about 3 years, we went to bars together, hung out some, but not like BFFs, or so I thought.
During the last year that I lived there he become obsessed with that stupid online game called World of Warcraft. (We were both full grown adults with real jobs, he had a girlfriend with kids, engaged to be married to her.) He stayed up until 4am every morning playing the game, started ignoring the fiance, kids, etc. He would go into work at 7:30 completely dragging ass. He eventually lost his job as a result. Ultimately the fiance took the kids and left also.
After I moved we kept in touch a little for about a year. We spoke on the phone maybe twice during that year. Never saw each other. I did ask him to be in my wedding party during that year but he bailed on me a week before the wedding and I had to ask another good friend to take his place. (Thanks Chris!) After that I just kind of decided I was done maintaining the relationship. I couldn't give two ****s about WoW so we had little in common any more and we never saw each other, lived far apart, etc. I wasn't necessarily mad about the wedding, just no longer cared to maintain a high maintenance friendship that was never super deep to begin with and lead to nowhere. A few years went by, he continued texting me, calling me every few months or so. For the most part I ignored him. When we did speak I kept the convo short, tried to make it clear to him that I didn't really have time for talking on the phone any more. He wasn't taking the hints. Then things got really weird ...
... He ended up getting back together with his ex-fiance and knocked her up. They decided to get married (she was 7 months pregnant at the wedding) and he asked me to be his best man over his 3 brothers and father. I told him I wasn't comfortable with it at all, that I would be in the party, but no more. He kept begging me to be his best man though. It got really, really awkward and I finally just was really deliberately mean to him, told him I thought it was ****ed up that he would choose me over his brothers or father, and he could have me in the party or not at all. He settled for that.
Well on the way to his wedding I hit a major traffic jam on I65. It took hours to clear out and I was just sitting there stuck, couldn't go anywhere. I left far enough in advance to where I was only 10 minutes late to the ceremony but apparently they started early and it was completely over, they were already starting the reception. I felt bad but also was glad that I didn't have to sit there in front of his brothers and father (whom I had never met) and have them looking at me wondering WTF he wanted me to be best man. He wasn't mad at me, everything was peachy, but I knew that that had to be the last time I would see him. That was about 5 years ago. The reception was super awkward also because his family is deeply racist. His father is a card-carrying KKK member and not ashamed to admit it. He had about 8 black guests at the wedding and the reception was completely segregated with his family shooting evil glares at the black people on the other side of the room, calling them the n-word, etc. That's another story though.
Its now been almost 9 years since I've seen him outside of the wedding. He continues calling and texting. I haven't answered any of them in about 4 years. Not a single word. He obviously isn't getting the point. Do I just allow him to continue getting ignored? Or do I call him and somehow break up with him? He has 4 kids now, 2 his own, 2 his wife's from anther father. He needs to worry about them, not maintaining a relationship with someone he hasn't spoken to in years or seen in almost a decade. My wife thinks I'm an asshole for ignoring him and not wanting to be friends. But I never felt like we were that great of friends to begin with.
During the last year that I lived there he become obsessed with that stupid online game called World of Warcraft. (We were both full grown adults with real jobs, he had a girlfriend with kids, engaged to be married to her.) He stayed up until 4am every morning playing the game, started ignoring the fiance, kids, etc. He would go into work at 7:30 completely dragging ass. He eventually lost his job as a result. Ultimately the fiance took the kids and left also.
After I moved we kept in touch a little for about a year. We spoke on the phone maybe twice during that year. Never saw each other. I did ask him to be in my wedding party during that year but he bailed on me a week before the wedding and I had to ask another good friend to take his place. (Thanks Chris!) After that I just kind of decided I was done maintaining the relationship. I couldn't give two ****s about WoW so we had little in common any more and we never saw each other, lived far apart, etc. I wasn't necessarily mad about the wedding, just no longer cared to maintain a high maintenance friendship that was never super deep to begin with and lead to nowhere. A few years went by, he continued texting me, calling me every few months or so. For the most part I ignored him. When we did speak I kept the convo short, tried to make it clear to him that I didn't really have time for talking on the phone any more. He wasn't taking the hints. Then things got really weird ...
... He ended up getting back together with his ex-fiance and knocked her up. They decided to get married (she was 7 months pregnant at the wedding) and he asked me to be his best man over his 3 brothers and father. I told him I wasn't comfortable with it at all, that I would be in the party, but no more. He kept begging me to be his best man though. It got really, really awkward and I finally just was really deliberately mean to him, told him I thought it was ****ed up that he would choose me over his brothers or father, and he could have me in the party or not at all. He settled for that.
Well on the way to his wedding I hit a major traffic jam on I65. It took hours to clear out and I was just sitting there stuck, couldn't go anywhere. I left far enough in advance to where I was only 10 minutes late to the ceremony but apparently they started early and it was completely over, they were already starting the reception. I felt bad but also was glad that I didn't have to sit there in front of his brothers and father (whom I had never met) and have them looking at me wondering WTF he wanted me to be best man. He wasn't mad at me, everything was peachy, but I knew that that had to be the last time I would see him. That was about 5 years ago. The reception was super awkward also because his family is deeply racist. His father is a card-carrying KKK member and not ashamed to admit it. He had about 8 black guests at the wedding and the reception was completely segregated with his family shooting evil glares at the black people on the other side of the room, calling them the n-word, etc. That's another story though.
Its now been almost 9 years since I've seen him outside of the wedding. He continues calling and texting. I haven't answered any of them in about 4 years. Not a single word. He obviously isn't getting the point. Do I just allow him to continue getting ignored? Or do I call him and somehow break up with him? He has 4 kids now, 2 his own, 2 his wife's from anther father. He needs to worry about them, not maintaining a relationship with someone he hasn't spoken to in years or seen in almost a decade. My wife thinks I'm an asshole for ignoring him and not wanting to be friends. But I never felt like we were that great of friends to begin with.
? 
