funny sayings??

xjcrawler · Dec 17, 2011

I'd eat a mile of her ****, just to see where it come from. :eat:

CSMITH · Dec 19, 2011

Never kick a fresh turd on a hot day......... :****:

mrtoddb · Dec 20, 2011

...So drunk they didn't know if they were afoot or horseback.
They was 9 foot tall, bulletproof and invisible!
Didn't know whether he was moppin or dancin!
Uglier than a mile of mud fence.
**** or fly, you walk I'll run over you!
I don't knowif she/he'd suck a ****, but sure looks and acts like she/he'd hold it in her/his mouth til the swellin went down.
Like trying to nail jello to a tree.
I've crawled over meaner motherfuckers than you to watch a fight!
Ain't but 5 bad motherfuckers in the world, and I get birthday cards from 4 of them.
I get through with you, they won't ask what happened, they'll just ask how you got away!!
Didn't know if they were shot, ****ed, stabbed or powder burned.
Could **** up a wet dream and a free lunch.
Uglier than a shoebox full of assholes.
Looks like their head caught on fire and somebody put it out with a rope.
Didn't know whether to **** or go blind.
Doesn't know beeshit from wild honey.
One drop of your sweat might cure cancer, but we'll never know.
If brains were dynamite, you couldn't blow your nose.
If? If flies had six shooters, frogs wouldn't **** with them!
Boy? You ever seen a boy put a rubber on with a tire tool?
Tighter than a dicks hatband.
We gonna fight, **** or draw pistols!
Drunker than a waltzing piss ant.
Goofy as a pet coon.
More fun than a basket full of puppies.
More nervous than a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.
Hotter than :afro: love in July.
...two miles from the jumping off spot, then turn.

more later...

broncomike · Dec 20, 2011

Madder than a gut shot Comanche!
And one of my favorites from Josie Wales You boys gonna pull those pistols or whistle Dixe!

TacomaJD · Dec 20, 2011

I'm out like a one legged kid at a swim meet. ;D

Draco · Dec 21, 2011

I'd bow up on that like a cricket on a bream hook.

Do Work 93YJ · Dec 21, 2011

Shes a breeder.
Shave that dog and teach it to hunt.

454tbacon · Dec 21, 2011

out of there like a fat kid in a dodgeball game.

RCMafia79 · Dec 21, 2011

You cant make chicken salad out of chicken ****

imarockfan · Dec 22, 2011

"more flexible than a boneless hooker on muscle relaxers"

Rockwells607 · Dec 22, 2011

shes uglier than 10 miles of dirt road

76nick · Dec 22, 2011

hey girl flop a ol titie out
im sweatin like 9 :afro: trying to add
thats about as good as a hand job on a honey moon
to a girl: if you were on my tv i would never turn it off
hey girl idk what that think is following you but it sure looks good from here

TacomaJD · Dec 22, 2011

I like you bout as much as I'd like to have a bad case of aids.

You ever had your tonsels tickled from the inside?

They call that dancing? ...looks more like a cricket kickin in a skillet.

76nick · Dec 22, 2011

if she's hot: i would drink her bath water

if she's really hot: i would drink her bath water after ridding dirt roads all day

TacomaJD · Dec 22, 2011

76nick said:
if she's hot: i would drink her bath water

if she's really hot: i would drink her bath water after ridding dirt roads all day

If she's smokin hot, I'd eat her full of boiled cabbage....and I don't even like cabbage.

...and if she's the hottest of the hot, I'd munch on her clit after she got done mowing a 20 acre yard in July.